:::rant:::

So I have been a slacker and have not updated in a while...sorry :(

Ya know how sometimes you meet people for the first time and you just get a feeling and you just don't like them? One of the girls who still works at the baby store is like that...anyway...she tried to tell me she knew ALL about what we were going through...although she had only tried for 1/2 as long...I am supposed to work at the baby store on Sat for the new guy - (it is his anniversary) and I realized this past weekend that the 17th (this Sat) is the year mark of when we lost our baby :( So the last place I'll really want to be on that anniversary is at a baby store. So I asked him if he could see if Feelings Girl to work for him instead. Well she threw a temper tantrum and demanded that I work for her the following Saturday and owe her one more....I'm thinking to myself...Um...you are not working for ME, honey...you're working for the new guy...HE should owe you not me...psycho. So I don't want to have her thinking that "Holly totally owes me" so I am just going to suck it up, take some Prozac and work Saturday.

Oh, did I mention that Feelings Girl is pregnant? Only like 10 weeks, but when she was 6 she was blabbing it to everyone...even customers. When she had her first ultrasound, she came in and asked me if it bothered me when other women talked about having babies, etc around me. I told her it didn't as long as they were not totally callous towards my feelings....well she proceeds to pull out her ultrasound and just go off on how great it is to be pregnant, etc...saying ALL the wrong stuff like "You just need to relax, that's what we did" or "Don't worry, you'll get your own someday"....ggrrrrrrr....

Now I have other friends who are good at the whole thing...they are happy for themselves but still aware that it might be painful for me so they are just nice about it...and man I wish they could teach classes to everyone on how to act because I KNOW I am not the only woman going through this out there!

Its like my other friend who started trying for a baby last spring and will have her baby this spring...she has this long sob story about how it took them so long...3 months?!? There are a TON of women who would KILL to only have to wait 3 months to get pregnant. And she then tells me she's pregnant through a mass e-mail. If she supposedly knows how hard it is to watch everyone around you get pregnant, and she didn't want me to have hard/mean feelings towards her when she got pregnant, couldn't she have at least sent me a separate e-mail, or called?!?

Sorry for the long rant...I have just been touchy, feely on the whole baby thing this past couple days. :(