Sunday, October 31, 2010


This was kind of a lame Halloween year at our house.  I caught a wicked nasty bug and spent Friday, Saturday and most of today in a drug-induced state.  If you know me at all you know just how much I {{LOVE}} it was a big bummer to get sick this weekend.  But being sick didn't stop us from cuddling on the couch, cranking up the fire and watching some scary movies.  Poor Winston had to be the one to fulfill my dress-up desires (well except for my black cat socks), Nathan was excited to trick-or-treat from our Halloween candy stash and I was relieved to have the weekend off (I only get one off a month) to rest. 

This is the second year in a row we've been lame for Halloween...we'll have to go all out next year. 

Oh - brownie points to whoever can name the source of Winston's quote.

November is gonna be busy

Ok, so November is National Adoption Month and it is also when I typically do 30 Days of Thankful.  So I decided to put the 30 Days of Thankful in a tab (look up...little more, little more...wait, down a the right...yep.  There you go!)  and accept a challenge from a fellow adoption blogger to post about adoption everyday.  (Thank heavens for post scheduling!)  Adoption is a wonderful option but still not one that many think about as a valid option.  The statistic that I see floating around the adoption world a lot is this one:

4% of non-marital births are placed for adoption. In the U.S. this is about 50,000 non-related adoptions a year compared to 1,500,000 babies aborted.

While adoption isn't right for everyone and subsequently everyone isn't right for adoption...when it IS right it can be an AWESOME thing.  If you don't normally post about adoption I'd challenge you to to do an adoption related post JUST ONCE during November.  Don't have any ideas?  Here are a few:
If you also want in on the 30 Days of Thankful goodness...just click on the image below, it will make it bigger and you can save it and use it.

I am excited for the month! Being focused on gratitude and adoption...what a way to spend 30 days, right?! 

Saturday, October 30, 2010

Sailor of the Year!

Guess who is Sailor of the Year for the band??  

Nathan works extremely hard at his job.  We live a good 45-60 minutes away from the base so he must get up with the birds everyday to catch the 5:50am train to get to work (which he has to walk 3/4mile to catch...even in the snow/sleet/wind/rain).   I have NEVER ONCE heard him complain about it.  (An example I could follow...)  He does what he's asked...and many things he's not asked, but he just knows they need to get done.  He is cheerful and happy and goes out of his way to make people laugh.  He received the nickname of 'Billy' his first week at this band and it's stuck...the story is actually quite funny, next time you're around Nathan, ask him about it.  He puts in many extra hours at home (he's sitting at the kitchen table right now putting a piece into the band members can have an easier copy to read) and at work making sure things get done...and so I think he definitely deserved the title!  Now he'll compete against all the other command's Sailors of the Year in the region...and if he wins that he'll get a NAM (Navy Achievement Medal...more bling for the uniform! and points for the advancement exam)

Way to go sweetie - you're the bestest sailor I know!

And just because I never put it on here and I think it's worth is Nathan doing his ASF (auxiliary security force...basically volunteer police for the Navy Base) training "final exam".  He gets pepper sprayed and then has to "take-down" some guys.  

Thursday, October 28, 2010

Good for something

Guess that one hour commute is good for something.  I get to listen to the news, talk radio, etc. and it looks like some of that information sunk in to my hard-headed brain.

To find out how you stack up...take THIS QUIZ.

If you take the quiz I'd be curious to know how you do.

Wednesday, October 27, 2010

Anxious curiosity

The 17th is getting close again...I wonder if this will be the year.  I hope so.

Confused??  READ THIS.

Lucky Number Seven

So I've been thinking.  We've now lost six babies.  Three through pregnancy loss and three through failed adoption.  I'm sending all sorts of positive vibes/thoughts/prayers out that the next time we're presented with a baby it will be the one!

Here's to Lucky Number Seven!

Monday, October 25, 2010

Changes coming our way

Move details to come...

Sunday, October 24, 2010

...I wonder how many miles we're in??

One year ago today Nathan and I stood in the rain, on a street corner, in front of a mailbox.  Our excitement showed in our smiles...we were {finally} taking an official step towards making our dreams of becoming parents come true.  At our intake interview I asked our caseworker about the average length of waiting to adopt...I wanted to know what to expect.  We were told the average is two years...from application to placement.   Here we are...a year into the average and what a year it has been.  The crazy/frustrating part is that we don't know how much longer we'll wait.  I have people ask me that all the time "How much longer?"...I wish I knew.  It could be three days, six months, a year, five years...or never (but we don't like to think about that option).

But for today I'm glad we're on our way even if we don't know how long the journey will be.

If you feel like passing along our info...and don't already know the specifics, here are our sites:

If you're interesting in taking some of our pass-along cards to have on hand, let me know and I';; get some in the mail to you.

Saturday, October 16, 2010


I saw this a while back on another adoption blog...I found it again today whilst perusing etsy for adoption related goodies. 

I can't even begin to tell you how much I {love} it.  It makes me teary. 

The image is by Barking Bird Art...and can be found here.

Pregnancy & Infant Loss Awareness

October 15th is National Pregnancy and Infant Loss Awareness Day.  If you have kiddos, hug them extra tight today and take a moment to remember all those mommies who have empty arms and babies who left this life too soon.

Tuesday, October 12, 2010


This weekend was an {{exhausting}} one.  Emotionally, physically and mentally.   Our congregation at church recently split.  And in the new congregation Nathan and I were both asked to serve in positions of responsibility.  He is the president of the men's organization and I am in the presidency for the children's organization.  We've both been busy getting all our respective duties done and I've felt very overwhelmed.  Sunday was my first Sunday teaching the kids...and it had kept me up late and I was worried sick (kids in numbers can be quite frightening!).  The whole night and early morning as I was preparing I told myself that after church I could come home and take a nap.  It was what I was living for.
Sunday meetings came, and everything went well...the kids were great.  Then after church the missionaries needed a ride somewhere...and also needed dinner.  We brought them home, I threw together a meal (which was tricky since I haven't been grocery shopping in a while) and we gave them a ride to their appointment.  As I was cleaning up the meal I was looking forward, again, to a quick nap before I had to head to work when I got a call from Nathan's cousin.  She had a friend who had an adoption connection and there was a baby that had been born and needed a family.  Several calls were made over the next few hours and we found out the details.

A sweet baby girl had been born premature and the family that had been matched with her had backed out.  She seemed to be doing well and once we overcame the initial shock, we started researching preemies and were trying to line up finances (the fee was WAY ouchy and the situation also involved us living in another state for 2 months until she was released from the NICU).  The more we thought about it the more excited we got.  I was just about to call the agency worker when she called me with bad news.  The adoption wasn't going to happen.  The birthmother had placed a baby a few years earlier and she had called the family this afternoon to see if they wanted this sweet baby girl.  They did.

I'm happy for this sweet baby girl.  She'll be with a family who will love her and she'll also have the benefit of growing up with a biological sibling.

But my heart hurts.  In the last 24 hours my hopes were inflated again...and now they're dashed.  Again.  Adoption is such an emotional roller coaster.  Last night I didn't sleep...the clickety clack of the ride going upwards had me worried and nervous and excited.  Tonight as I crested the hill and began the emotional freefall I wonder how many more I can make it though.

Saturday, October 09, 2010

Better than expected

Today could have been a really bad day.  I dread this day every year,  and each year it comes and goes and over the four years that we've had to deal with this date some have been easier than others.  Last night was the Navy Ball and it put me in a good mood to deal with today.  Then today Nathan and I slept in (we were a wee bit tucked out from last night - we stayed up way past our bedtime), picked up our newly fixed Helga, went to lunch (sushi...yummy), took a nap... and it definitely didn't hurt that the weather today was PERFECT (I love Chicago in the fall).
Each year as the last few hours of October 9th pass away my heart aches knowing what could have been.  Then I think about next year, and hope that by the next time we have to face this painful anniversary we might be lucky enough to have a child to hold in our arms.  This year proves to be no different.  As I sit and type the deepest desire of my heart is that I can someday be a mother.  But I am also filled with extreme gratitude that today wasn't as emotionally devastating as it could have been.

Navy Ball 2010

I get really excited for the Navy Ball every year...because truth be told if I could wear a formal dress everyday I would.  I think Nathan is slightly less excited than I, but he humors me and will even bust a move or two on the dance floor.

Trumpet Playing Taps During the Ceremony = Teary
Dance Band = Awesome
Spending the Evening with the Packers = Perfect
Purple Eye Makeup = Wicked Sweet
Pie at Baker's Square After the Ball = Perfect Ending

Here's some photographic evidence of our awesomeness. :)

 Mr & Mrs

 Fancy Footwear

 Purple Eye Makeup - did it myself.  I'm pretty proud!

 Table decor

 The Packers - singing along to Just the Two of Us.  Well...the Dr Evil version

 Kissey Kissey

 Winnie was SO HAPPY when we got home.  He {loves} his momma.

The cutest couple at the ball. 

Friday, October 08, 2010

Being prepared

Ok all my mommy friends, I need your advice.  We are trying to be prepared for when we do get a kid (in case it is wicked little notice) and we're doing pretty good...have you seen that gorgeous nursery??  We have some clothes (all tiny size and all matching pink and blue...but hey, at least we're prepared for both now) and a crib and plenty of bottles (we were prepared for strictly formula feeding twins...) and pacifiers and tons and tons and tons of blankets and burp cloths.  Some things I know exactly what I want (like car seat, stroller, swing) but there are a few things that just have me stumped:  bathtub, diapers and playpen.  So I'm curious what those of you who've served in the trenches of motherhood have to say.

#1 - Bathtub
Let me preface this one by saying that there is NO WAY that our kitchen sink will function as a bathing center.  My OCD will just not allow gives me the heebie-ma-jeebies.  So this leads me to the dilemma.  Do I need a bathtub?  The sink in our hall bathroom is kinda like a can see it here.  I also have THIS tub already, but it won't be any good until a baby can sit on their own.  (And yes I know that even then, a child should never be left alone in the tub.)  So what do you say?  Do I use the bathroom sink until they are big enough for the duck tub or so I spring for a tub?   If I do get a tub, I like The Tummy Tub, I've heard really good things about it.

 #2 - Diapers
I would love to be the mom that could do cloth diapers...but I honestly don't think I'm that mom.  But with that said, the thought of mounds and mounds of my child's diapers being sent to rot in landfills for the rest of time or until they are burned in a nuclear winter??  Makes me sick to my stomach.  So I started searching for alternatives...and I found G Diapers.  I love them...but I want to know first hand experience from someone who has used them.  They have the option for cloth inserts, should my opinions change, but the disposable inserts are FLUSHABLE, compostable or if thrown out they biodegrade completely within a year.   If you haven't heard of G Diapers, there are some great videos on is a good one.

#3 - Playpen
Do I really need one?  We live in a 2 bedroom urban apartment...the nursery is less than 10 steps from either our room or the main living area.  So needing one as a second sleeping spot isn't needed (we have a cute bassinet already...for use those first weeks...something we can keep in our room), and the other time I can think that we would need one is when we visit family.  But both our parents have cribs at their house and we'd be the only ones needing to use we won't need one for that either.  But here comes the sticky, not sure how to word this one.   So, say I wanna take a shower or use the bathroom or prep dinner and my super active crawler baby is awake and I need someplace to um, contain them...would I want a playpen for that?  And I'm guessing that the models with attached bassinets (keeping in mind our living situation) would be a waste of money, right?  I like The Joovy Room2 cause it's it would be useful as our child grows. 

Ok, so to recap:
1 - Do I need a tub?
2 - G Diapers...used them?
3 - Playpen...yes or no?

(Also - just to divert any questions and squelch curiosity we are not matched with a birthmother, we have NO situations on the horizon...we haven't heard so much as a squeak from anyone since our failed adoption.  I just figured while we're waiting we can pick up some things we'll need and start stockpiling diapers)