Thursday, October 22, 2009

The Big One

So in church a couple of months ago one of the lessons was on trials and enduring them well. One guy made a comment that got me thinking and I (obviously) have an opinion and I wondered what other people thought. The guy said that he heard from some authority figure (the name he couldn't recall...and yes, right now my eyebrow is raised) of our church that every person will get one big trial in their life. He said that if you haven't had it yet, don't rest on your laurels...and if you have had it, feel good that you made it.

I have to say that I disagree. ONE big trial? ONE? Um, ya, I don't think so. I think some people will get one, some will get none and some will get twenty. I also think the definition of a BIG trial varies from person to person. I mean, we've lost three babies. Some people wouldn't be able to get through that. I know people who have lost spouses, I wouldn't be able to make it through that. I think missing the bus on the way to work would be a big trial to some people while others could handle losing everything they posses in a fire or tornado.

I think you just have to play the hand that is dealt to you. If you get a crappy one, well, that sucks. Play it through and wait for your next one. If you get a good one, enjoy it. If you get three crappy ones in a row, well, that sucks more. Life isn't fair. Some people seem to skate along on golden paths and never have any challenges. Yet others seem to face giant stumbling blocks every step of the way.

I guess I should take it as a compliment that the Lord saw me as strong enough to deal with the challenges we've faced. I may not have handled them all the best, but I got through. I survived, and He knew I would. I know that throughout the remainder of my days my path will take me through some nasty stuff. I don't think that my trials are done. I don't think you get the BIG ONE and then you're done, and in a weird, creepy way I am glad it isn't that way. If it were we would wait our whole lives for this ONE trial, we would go through it and then just sit on our duffs wasting the remainder of our days.


Sheila said...

I think you nailed it on the head. Everyone's trials are different and I personally think that trying to categorize trials is silly. For someone to say they've had one big trial and whew, I'm all done, seems to be saying that they don't want to learn all they were sent to earth to learn. Like you said, some trials are big to one person and HUGE to another, or another who hasn't had the same sort of trial so can't relate to how big it is. It's all a matter of the principles of faith, in my opinion. If I know without a doubt the Heavenly Father knows me, by name, and knows what I need to learn to return to him, then nothing is going to be a trial that I can't handle. Now, that doesn't mean I'm looking for trials, but bring on the learning! ;) (I have to be reminded of all of this on a pretty contstant basis!)

And, yes, I think you should have raised eyebrows when someone can't remember who, what, or when...!

Ryann said...

Yeah, this guy didn't know what he was talking about. I agree with you and just hope that I can get through whatever is thrown my way. And by the way, you were gorgeous in your gown!

Abby said...

I agree, the guy was smoking crack. The idea of counting your trials until you get to a magical number and you're done is pure fallacy. If you pass one trial, you will receive another, period. It will continue until the day you die, otherwise where is the progression? If we are not continually progressing then we are failing and thus not doing what we were sent here to earth to accomplish.

I do have one bone to pick with something you mentioned a couple of times there though. It's just as ludicrous to believe that there are people on this earth with no trials, or not "big" trials in your opinion. Do you honestly believe that? Without any trials at all that person's life is meaningless. That person is a son or daughter of God sent here to learn and grow the same as everyone else. To assume that simply because their lives appear to be picture-perfect from your perspective does not mean that they are not struggling with some pretty significant trials of their own. In many cases the trials that aren't seen are the hardest to overcome; just because those seemingly perfect people are hiding them from public scrutiny does in no way suggest they do not exist or do not pay a very heavy toll on that person's soul and the lives of their family and friends.

It's been often said that if we could have an unfiltered view of every person's life as a whole we wouldn't trade places with anyone else for all the money in the world. There's no way to prove such a thing, but it reminds me when I get jealous of another's circumstances that I wouldn't enjoy the trials that that person is also dealing with in conjunction with the awesome things that I see on the surface. Don't ever go through life thinking you have it worse than anyone else. Everyone's life is challenging. There aren't any people just skating through. They may look it, but I assure you they're not. They are giving others that impression intentionally to hide the pain they're experiencing. And thus, there are no people with free rides here--only better actors.

tnw said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Timothy said...

Hmm...makes me wonder what Job's one big trial was. And for that matter what was Joseph Smith's?

Lori said...

I think it's hard sometimes when God throws trials at you that you feel are so overwhelming and you look around and want to scream when you see other people who seemingly have none. I agree with Abby that everyone has trials, even if we can't see them. I have to remind myself that on a regular basis. Sometimes Van and I just feel like we're a big punching ball and others 'skate by' but I KNOW that's not the case... however I can relate to realness of your feelings .

I don't agree with your Sunday School teacher. The Lord sent us down here on ONE big test, yes. But that includes a lifetime of trials, mistakes, and learning. How sad would it be that our eternal glory relied on how we handle one trial? Personally, I feel like we learn and grow with each trial we go through... it's like a refining process. Hopefully by our last trial we will have been molded to be the person the Lord knew we could be!